Very little in options
nowhere for me
I’m now just an experiment
A shadow of my former self
at this point
Aches, pains, noises and
much more rule me
Violations and numbers now
Only mad at myself and that
is all I can be…
I went again after work to donate plasma but when my adrenaline gets going it takes a good 90 minutes for my vitals to come close to normal and I was way over.Mind you I took a valium and two muscle relaxers, sat for 30 minutes and I still was wayyyy too high. Given 15 more minutes I was just as high again yet look fine all the same, SAD.
A person new to me that I broke in by has gone from friend to foe it seems. Me going from an ally and trusted to being back stabbed possibly but definitely complained about for no reason. I wondered why I had a massive switch in schedule.
But when all higher ups call that young lady a little girl who doesn’t know what she’s doing I still take offense to it. To boot now they are making fun of her in front of me and I’m sure of me in front of her yet she won’t even talk to me.
Oh my I ride a bike to work, have had three ailments with meds coursing through my body and coming out and it makes me unable to do anything about it. Being new things have come to a head the one they all laugh about and call little girl has things she’d love to know but now I’m staying mute despite me working two nights with her. She’s suddenly stopped talking to me rather at me or just a response. Putting it in Danny glovers line, I’m getting too old for this shit.
Everything went wrong
My whole face was swollen and red
It is hella cold and the ride, long
Sent home from work didn’t help
I thought we wee cool, I wrote a pm
you never answered
I feel like a monster and looked
Are you the one I never had sadly
You came in with light and flirting
through our words, we spiral
You write and I answer to raise the
Yesterday was such a lonely day and
I should hear your voice
Just that alone makes torture just a
thing and I’d be fine
Without you and I bantering I many
not be just fine but…
2017 Copyright Paul McAleavey wwwpalfitness.wordpress.com
Which way should I turn?
What happens if I choose wrong?
Will I lose it all?
Can I stay trapped here?
Can it be purgatory?
Could I die in here?
Dropped here to the curb
Dying on the inside now
Damn, why’d she do this?
The loss cost it all
There’s no way now to stop this
Truly sad by this…😰
Getting home not checking tickets
with bad writers
When I get someone who does and
hits it’s twice they blame ME when they lose
No such thing
I can’t blame a line change especially if I have no
time to play and check proper and it has hurt me
We are all supposed to have the same lines but don’t
Then again love is supposed to be certain and is not
So double entendre.
Plus I have different ppl in management saying do
I am the only PT er and that will not change for a while,
unless someone dies or I start somewhere else…
Sadly Garrett Gomez, who rode Blame passed away tonight as being reported by major horse racing publishments including The Blood Horse. Garrett, like many riders, had a lifelong history of substance abuse and he retired a year ago at 43.