Memories I don’t want to lose

Remembering all things, good and bad

all a blur

Sometimes a side effect of mind altering

drugs

Is it real?, Is it Memorex?, Is it just that I

am insane?

I do not care as I am not me without these

thoughts

Many are like heavy nightmares i can’t

wake up from

Some I do wake from to find a place I

don’t recognize

At times these are so surreal that I’d

see butterflies fly without wings

I could envision Unicorns that have

their horn sideways

Feelings that I am being operated on

and I die and SEE it as I float away

Do I see myself injuring myself on bad

days and making DEEP CUTS?

Those from the sharpest blades, from

strongest medications

Lucid awareness or lack thereof that

hails me from the hell I am in

I am not allowed to leave but I am

not wanted to stay

Purgatory as I am in constant wait

for you, for me to be me and more

I am a reckless emotion!

 

2017 Copyright Paul McAleavey wwwpalfitness.wordpress.com

 

 

The smallest things…

A sunny day

A window to look out of

A frolic in the park

Seeing any movie

Eating out anywhere

Making a meal and a mess

Playing with a puppy

All things enhanced by you

All things dulled without…

Where did you go?

You remember our place

Let’s say be there at 8?

Don’t worry if you are late

Just to see you would be seal OUR FATE…

2017 Copyright Paul McAleavey wwwpalfitness.wordpress.com

 

 

Your perfect hair

I know it is I was there, remember?

100 strokes back and forth

I did your straight iron for you on

most nights

I remember having that glow in

your cheeks while having

pillow fights

Do you still think of the walks

to nowhere?

Does it dawn to you that my

Birthday is soon?

Does it matter that you left me

raw and open?

When we chased each other

around trees

When we climbed neighbors

fences and were free…

When we trained and just had

fun doing it…..

Are you even the same person

anymore I wonder?

Are you the one with the huge

heart that blushes often?

Are you unable to tell one

from another?

But>>>

The SUN

The WIND

The EARTH

The MOON

The TRANCE

The DANCE

The PRANCE

The RACE

The DATE

Always was and always still is YOUR PERFECT HAIR…

***ALL I HAVE IS JUST HAVE A MEMORY OF YOU AND I TOGETHER***

2017 Copyright Paul McAleavey wwwpalfitness.wordpress.com

 

 

 

Wounded!!!

You did this to me

Your opened HEART with a KEY

You then CLOSED the DOOR

 

We were much better

We strided to just CONQUER

We became ROYALs

 

I’m left so confused

I’m left questioning MYSELF

I’m without you BUT…

 

Yet there is TODAY

Yes there is a chance MEETING

Yet I am AFRAID

 

Because I’m EMPTY

Before I was far WORSE

But now I’m just done…

 

2017 Copyright Paul McAleavey wwwpalfitness.wordpress.com

 

 

 

A Void in a word or five

Empty

without presence

lost in one’s own mind

dark sullen eyes

locked inside a rubber room?

are you crazy?

are you dangerous?

without remorse?

no memory

no thoughts

nothing

blank

D

E

V

O

I

D

.

.

.

2017 Copyright Paul McAleavey wwwpalfitness.wordpress.com

That familiar scent

You used to tease me with it

You never divulged

It was a hint smoky

A hint floral

A hint of wind from the heavens

As if you jumped up and used the sun

The air as you walked by stopped traffic

A pheromone for sure

Almost visioning men following in droves

Like a scene from an old movie….

Love potion number 9

You: always wanting an audience

Me: deciding not to let you win any more

You: constantly trying

Me: always pretending

You: frustrated and crying inside

Me: comforting and laughing inside

But I will never forget the way I felt

The way you wanted me to

The way at first I did

Then I had to change

But that smell still haunts me…

 

2017 Copyright Paul McAleavey wwwpalfitness.wordpress.com

Lilies in her hair

Exquisite flora fits her cheeks so well

dies inside to be in her way

She seems to always find my path on

a daily romp around town

Why do we never speak?, not even a

little bit

Trying to but you whisp up your cell

as I get close

You eye me up and down, laugh and

seem to blush

You torture me but I think it is you

that is afraid

Yes you, with the lilies in your hair

wearing eye catching nothingless

Nothing gets me away from both your

lilies and your eyes

Then again there is a quake to how

your lips tremble

You will eventually drop your guard

as this is not coincidence

You seem to relish dancing around me

and I can’t take it

You and your never ending dazzling

display of new colors of lilies daily

One day your loving will be all mine

it will be oh so good

2017 Copyright Paul McAleavey wwwpalfitness.wordpress.com