Slightly better but testing it is bad

Being I brutalized myself yesterday and was largely alone in my shell while fielding tests and giving responses to OK by a few people, it was bad. Today’s first test was merely sitting upward for 10 minutes. My pulse went to 120 just sitting with the blood pumping hard into my calv. I had to test it further by picking up a script and riding 1.5 miles downhill with 35 mph winds at my back, meaning it would suck coming back. Riding there hurt, standing hurt more and breaking down to a walk coming back killed. But I need to go to school and work and will be hurting tomorrow and I’d say Thursday but the jury is not out on that and it is gonna be a depressing day and night.

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